Sexy Messy Hair

Sexy messy hair
Photo: MillaF/Shutterstock
Q: My husband finds messy hair sexy. He loves it when my bangs get too long and partly cover my eyes. I'm confused. What's the deal with "sexy messy hair"? I've always been taught that neat hair is the most attractive look. Am I being old-fashioned?
 
A: Beauty standards and hair trends are constantly evolving, and what's considered attractive today might be quite different from what was popular even a decade ago. The concept of "sexy messy hair" has become increasingly mainstream, representing a shift toward more relaxed, effortless-looking styles that suggest authenticity and natural beauty.
 
The appeal of deliberately tousled or "undone" hair lies in its suggestion of spontaneity and approachability. This look creates an impression of someone who is confident enough not to appear overly polished or trying too hard. It's meant to evoke a sense of having just rolled out of bed or been caught in a gentle breeze.
 
While you may have grown up with the understanding that neat hairstyles were the standard for attractiveness, it's important to know that beauty ideals are deeply influenced by the moment and social contexts. The "messy" hair trend actually has deep historical roots. In the late 1970s, Farrah Fawcett's feathered, windswept style was revolutionary because it looked effortlessly tousled, as if she'd just stepped off a beach. Similarly, the grunge movement of the 1990s celebrated deliberately unkempt hair as a form of rebellion against overly manufactured beauty standards.
 
Today's messy hair trend is more sophisticated than simply not brushing your hair. It's actually a carefully crafted look that requires specific techniques, products, and often considerable time to achieve. Hair stylists use texturizing sprays and strategic scrunching to create volume and movement that appears natural but is actually quite deliberate.
 
Messy hair look with a bob
 
The appropriateness of any hairstyle, including messy styles, depends entirely on the context and setting. For professional environments, formal events, or solemn occasions, a more controlled hairstyle remains the appropriate choice. However, for casual social situations, romantic evenings, or relaxed gatherings, a more tousled look can be perfectly suitable and even preferable.
 
Personal comfort and confidence are the most attractive qualities anyone can possess. If a more structured, neat hairstyle makes you feel confident and beautiful, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that preference. Beauty isn't about following every trend, but rather about finding styles that make you feel yourself while being appropriate for your lifestyle and the situations you encounter.
 
The key is having options to choose different looks for different occasions. You might opt for a sleek, professional style during work hours and experiment with more relaxed, tousled looks during your personal time. This flexibility allows you to express different aspects of your personality while respecting the expectations of various social and professional contexts.
 
©Hairfinder.com
 
See also:
 
What makes a hairstyle sexy?
 
Hairstyles for business women
 
Farah Fawcett's feathered shag
 
How do you put your hair up in a messy bun?