Softer Moustache

Man with a moustache and his wife
Photo: Phovoir/Shutterstock
Q: My husband has had a moustache since he was 18. He's now 52. He's only shaved it once and I hated it. He has no upper lip! Now, as he's gotten older, his moustache is so sharp I can hardly stand to kiss him. It's like needles in my face and nose. How can he soften his moustache?
 
A: Well, I can understand your plight. I have a moustache myself and have been read the riot act from time to time when my whiskers get too bristly.
 
The thing to keep in mind is that beards and moustaches are just like the rest of the hair on your body. They require proper care and conditioning to keep them soft and pliable. Most men simply soap up their faces with whatever cleanser is at hand and rinse it away. To them, this constitutes the total of their facial care routine.
 
Yet imagine what would happen if you did that to the hair on your head. Considering that facial hair tends to be coarser, wirier, and drier than scalp hair (especially as natural oil production slows down with age), it needs even more intensive conditioning and moisture to keep it soft.
 
I can recommend a few things to help you soften up your husband's moustache:
 
• Watch how he trims: Trimming straight across the lip line leaves sharp, flat edges on coarse hair, which can make it feel more like needles for a day or two. Have him use small beard scissors or a dry electric trimmer. Afterward, he should brush his moustache to smooth out the freshly cut ends.
 
• Ditch the regular soap: Bar soaps and harsh facial cleansers strip away natural oils, making coarse hair feel like straw. He should use a gentle beard wash or a hydrating facial cleanser that won't dry out the whiskers.
 
• Bring in dedicated beard oil or balm: While aftershave balms are mostly designed to soothe skin after shaving, beard oil or a leave-in beard balm (containing ingredients like jojoba oil, argan oil, or shea butter) is made specifically to penetrate and soften coarse facial hair. Applying a couple of drops daily right after a warm shower - when the pores and hair shafts are open - and combing it through will make a huge difference.
 
• Try deep conditioning treatments: Using a hot, moist towel over the moustache for a couple of minutes opens the hair cuticles. Following that up with a deep conditioner, beard butter, or a hot oil treatment once a week will work wonders for stubborn bristles.
 
It may take a week or two of consistent care, but once he starts a routine of proper washing and daily conditioning, you will see a difference quickly and enjoy a much softer feel from your husband's whiskers.
 
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See also:
 
Moustaches
 
Hot oil hair treatment
 
How do you grow a moustache?