Hair Out of Control

Girl with racially mixed hair
Photo: Irina Bg/Shutterstock
Q: I am racially mixed. My mother is white, and my father is half-Black and half-white. So, genetically speaking, I’m about a quarter Black and three-quarters white. However, my hair leans more toward an African-American texture, which presents its own unique challenges.
 
When my hair is wet, it’s much easier to manage. It swings beautifully, feels smooth, and behaves similarly to my Caucasian friends’ hair. Brushing it while wet (which I do daily) helps straighten it temporarily, and the curls that form are well-defined and attractive. But once it dries, everything changes. It becomes poofy, frizzy, and completely unmanageable. Recently, I got layers cut into it, which helped a little, but if I leave it down without styling, it puffs up into an unflattering pyramid shape. The only solution I’ve found so far is pulling it back. I also have bangs, which add another layer of complexity to my styling routine.
 
My current daily routine involves washing and conditioning my hair, then wrapping it in a towel for about 10–15 minutes. After that, I apply one or two squirts of hair serum, followed by mousse, a bit of gel at the ends for scrunching, and a few spritzes of hairspray. I know this seems like a lot of product, but I feel like I have no other choice! While this routine has improved the situation, by the end of the day, my hair still ends up poofy and frizzy.
 
I’ve tried nearly every product on the market: Sunsilk Anti-Poof, Infusium 23, TRESemmé, V05, Suave, Pantene, Garnier Fructis, and even horse shampoo. I’ve also experimented with DIY treatments like mayonnaise, vegetable oil, and Vaseline (yes, Vaseline!). In terms of styling methods, I’ve flat-ironed, blow-dried, relaxed, and chemically straightened my hair, but nothing gives me long-lasting control. My hair is about shoulder-length, reaching the top of my back. At this point, I’m out of ideas. What else can I do? Please help!
 
A: Based on your description, your hair seems to respond best when it’s weighed down, which is why it behaves well when wet and why layering multiple products gives you better (though still temporary) results. Many people with thick, curly, or frizz-prone hair find that they need to use a combination of products to achieve their desired look, so you’re not alone in this struggle.
 
The key is to ensure that while you’re controlling frizz and poofiness, you’re also maintaining your hair’s health. Since you’re using a lot of styling products, it’s important to incorporate a clarifying shampoo into your routine once every few washes to prevent buildup, which can make hair look dull and feel heavy. Additionally, regular deep conditioning treatments will help keep your hair moisturized and resilient.
 
Given your hair’s texture, I’d recommend trying a weekly moisturizing treatment with cholesterol cream (available at most beauty supply stores). Here’s how to do it:
 
1. Apply the cholesterol to your hair (wet or dry) and comb it through with a wide-tooth comb to ensure even distribution.
 
2. Cover your hair with a plastic cap or plastic wrap and sit under a hooded dryer for about 20 minutes. If you don’t have a dryer, you can wrap your head in warm towels (heated in the clothes dryer) for 20–30 minutes.
 
3. Rinse the treatment out with warm water, then shampoo and condition as usual. Finish with a cool-water rinse to help seal the hair cuticle and boost shine.
 
For daily frizz control, consider switching to a high-quality anti-frizz serum like John Frieda’s Frizz Ease or FX Silk Drops. These contain silicones that form a protective barrier around each strand, locking in moisture and adding weight to keep your hair smooth.
 
Another important step is to check your current products for alcohol, which can be extremely drying and worsen frizz. Swap them for alcohol-free alternatives. Additionally, a lightweight, fruit-oil-based leave-in conditioner spray (like Garnier Fructis’s Sleek & Shine) can be a lifesaver for midday touch-ups. A quick spritz when your hair starts to frizz can help re-tame it without weighing it down too much.
 
Finally, if you haven’t already, consult a stylist who specializes in mixed-texture or curly hair. They can assess your hair’s specific needs and may suggest a customized cut or treatment (like a keratin smoothing treatment) that could provide longer-lasting results.
 
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